9 random and totally useless iPhone apps

10 random and totally useless iPhone apps
By Miss Gadget
We are all in love with the iPhone at the moment (or so it seems). We have gone iCrazy. Developers are popping out apps like they are going out of fashion (which of course they are not). The Apple store boasts over 75,000 apps alone; some of which are really cool and useful and others… well.. are not so useful. There are some really strange and totally pointless apps out there, so I thought I would share my favourites on this fabulous Friday.
1. Drunk Dialer
This app attempts to avert a drunken catastrophe, forcing the user to hold the device steady while the attempt to dial a number; if they are swaying drunkenly, then tapping in a telephone number will be impossible. This app is totally random, and of course, won’t prevent drunk texting, so in this regards seems totally pointless. The other thing to consider is, if they are that drunk will they really have the foresight to open the application before ringing someone? Probably not!
2. Hold On
This app is for all those bored idiots out there who have a few minutes to spare. This purpose of this app is to see how long you can press a virtual button. The timer will measure your endurance levels, and then you can submit your score to your own personal mini league. You get the satisfaction of beating your own personal best. My advice? Put down the iPhone and go out and get some real friends!
3. Hello Cow
Possible one of the most pointless iPhone apps to date. Basically it is a picture of a cow that appears on your screen and when you touch it, it “moos.” Good for people with a very short attention.
4. iBeer and iMilk
These apps are equally as lame as each other. What might be a novelty for all of five seconds, quickly wears off once you realize your thirst hasn’t been quenched and you are that loser that tries to drink their phone. Basically they simulate a beer or a glass of milk being poured. The user can then pretend to drink the beer or the glass of milk by tipping the phone up to their mouth. Hmm… how about just getting a real drink? Hell of a lot cheaper and ten times more effective.
5. iPeriod
This app probably doesn’t need a whole lot of explaining, but it’s a calendar that will keep track of a lady’s monthlies. I am thinking that if you need a phone to tell you when such an event is going to occur, you have bigger problems!
6.   Mirror
This is for all those vain people out there who can’t afford to splash out $2.50 for a compact mirror. True to its name, this app turns the screen of the iPhone into a mirror. The Mirror app comes with 9 frames to choose from to let you check yourself out in style. There are no words.
7. Zits and Giggles
This is for those people who have a really weird fetish with popping pimples (as gross as it sounds). If you are bored with popping your own pimples then download this app and pop away. Extremely pointless and quite disturbing.
8. iSmoke
This one is definitely for the kiddies. Let’s encourage them to smoke shall we? They will be the coolest kid on the playground with this little app. It simulates the process of smoking. The user can swirl the smoke around with their finger and then watch it dissipate. Here’s a tip, go outside and watch grass grow. It’s free and will probably be more exciting.
9. Virtual spin the bottle
For all those horny teenagers out there who are too poor to buy a real bottle.  Users tap the bottle and it spins around and stops after a few seconds. Apparently it will help decide who goes to the bar, who gets a kiss, or who has to reveal a secret. How about opening your mouth and just pointing your finger at someone instead?
Now I am sure this list only just scratches the surface. Have you downloaded or come across any other weird or wacky iPhone apps?

By Miss Gadget

We are all in love with the iPhone at the moment (or so it seems). We have gone iCrazy. Developers are popping out apps like they are going out of fashion, and the Apple store now boasts over 75,000 apps. Some are great… others… are not. In fact there are some downright random and totally useless iPhone apps out there, so I thought I would share my favourites on this fabulous Friday.

1. Drunk Dialer
This app attempts to avert a drunken catastrophe, forcing the user to hold the device steady while they attempt to dial a number drunk; if they are swaying, then tapping in a telephone number will be impossible. This app is totally random, and of course, won’t prevent drunk texting, so in this regard seems totally pointless. The other thing to consider is, if they are that drunk will they really have the foresight to open the application before ringing someone?

2. Hold On
This app is for all those bored idiots out there who have a few minutes to spare. This purpose of this app is to see how long you can press a virtual button. The timer will measure your endurance levels, and then you can submit your score to your own personal mini league. You get the satisfaction of beating your own personal best. My advice? Put down the iPhone and go out and get some real friends!

3. Hello Cow
Possible one of the most pointless iPhone apps to date. Basically it is a picture of a cow that appears on your screen and when you touch it, it “moos”. Good for people with a very short attention span.

4. iBeer and iMilk
These apps are equally as lame as each other. What might be a novelty for all of five seconds, quickly wears off once you realise your thirst hasn’t been quenched and you are that weirdo on the street trying to drink from a phone. Basically this app simulates the process of a beer or a glass of milk being poured. The user can then pretend to drink the beer or the glass of milk by tipping the phone up to their mouth. Hmm… how about just getting a real drink? Hell of a lot cheaper and ten times more effective.

5. iPeriod
This app probably doesn’t need a whole lot of explaining, but it’s a calendar that will keep track of that special time of the month for a lady. I am thinking that if you need a phone to tell you this, you have bigger problems!

6.   Mirror
This is for all those vain people out there who can’t afford to splash out $2.50 for a compact mirror. True to its name, this app turns the screen of the iPhone into a mirror. The app comes with nine frames to choose from to let you check yourself out in style. There are no words.

7. Zits and Giggles
This is for those people who have a really weird fetish with popping pimples (as gross as it sounds). If you are bored with popping your own pimples then download this app and pop away. Extremely pointless and quite disturbing.

8. iSmoke
This one is definitely for the kiddies. They will be the coolest kid on the playground with this little app. It simulates the process of smoking. The user can swirl the smoke around with their finger and then watch it dissipate. Here’s a tip, go outside and watch grass grow. It’s free and will probably be more exciting.

9. Virtual spin the bottle
For all those horny teenagers out there who are too poor to buy a real bottle. Users tap the bottle and it spins around and stops after a few seconds. Apparently it will help decide who goes to the bar, who gets a kiss, or who has to reveal a secret. How about opening your mouth and just pointing your finger at someone instead?

Now I am sure this list only just scratches the surface. Have you downloaded or come across any other weird or wacky iPhone apps?

  • Patrick

    Virtual Spin the Bottle should be the number one USEFUL app!

  • http://www.dynamicexport.com.au Adeline Teoh

    I personally think the iBeer is a bit of a tease: “you are that weirdo on the street trying to drink from a phone” – and that’s BEFORE you’ve drunk it!

  • Mark Veratis

    I was watching an episode of Top Gear recently with Stephen Fry and he was talking about an iPhone app called ‘Glidr’ (or something similar) and it was an app where men can cruise for other men and it will say how far away these men are… Hmm..

  • Me

    Aren’t all iPhone apps totally useless

  • Valonmull

    Battle Duty- Modern Feild 3. Meeeehhhhhhhh!!!!!